Be honest with yourself, how many times have you heard the pretentious person in your friend group or family say something like, “Yeah, I’m just really trying to have more balance in my life right now”. This is a safe space, so we can be honest with each other, those guys suck.
That is until, I became one of these guys
Now before you get upset, let me explain. I certainly didn’t expect to be this way. This way of life was thrust upon me, the same way Peter Parker didn’t ask to be Spiderman, I didn’t ask to be the pretentious friend at the potluck, I was chosen for it (Yes, I just compared myself to Spiderman, get over it).
You see, in Occupational Therapy, we have nine different dimensions of wellness that we consider our occupations. Over our lifespan, our participation and performance of all nine dimensions ebbs and flows. Yet arguably, our main goal is striking a balance between them all.
The dimensions are as follows: Activities of Daily Living, Instrumental Activities of Daily Living, Work, Leisure, Play, Health Management, Social Participation, Rest and Sleep, and Education.
First, we must learn our limits
The analogy I envision when discussing this is the act of spinning plates. Imagine yourself spinning plates, each plate represents one of the occupations in your life that has significance to you. For example, some of mine would be spending time with friends and family, training martial arts, and working at my job. Everyone has their limit to how many plates you can spin/balance at one time, let’s say you can comfortably do 7. You may be able to spin 8 or even 9 for a small amount of time, albeit uncomfortably.
Ask yourself, what happens when that 8th or 9th plate starts to fall?
Do you correct yourself to catch it?
If so, what happens to the other plates, do they start to fall as well?
Ultimately, do most or almost all of the plates fall?
When they fall, if we’re lucky, they may be unharmed; however, more than likely they crack, or break completely, causing significant damage to the plates.
As adults we realize that we never want all of our plates to drop, especially knowing that when they fall there is possibility of them breaking for good or having significant enough damage to the plate that they may never be the same. On the other hand, we also know that sometimes we have to carry an extra plate or two. I would argue, that testing these limits, dropping our plates, is necessary for us to understand our limits.
Second, we must practice balance
This looks differently for all of us, it is our journey, our experiences that allow us practice balance, and these are unique to all of us. Your balance may be purely physical, or purely spiritual, anywhere in between, and with any combination you choose.
Over time, we strike such a comfortability with our balance, that it becomes inherent, seamless, effortless even. That is until, an outside force comes, a gust of wind causes all of our plates to teeter, some may even fall no matter how hard we try. In life, this looks like a death in the family, a sudden change in financial stability, or an unexpected pregnancy.
These challenges are inevitable, they are our destiny, and ultimately our responsibility to overcome. As we concluded, we want to avoid dropping our plates if we can, so what do we do in these times of uncertainty?
Well, we set the damn plates down of course!
Remind yourself, that the same way you picked those plates up, you can set them down just as easily, sometimes this is the best option…
Third, we must rid ourselves of balance
We have the blinders on, we look at balance as some state that MUST be constant, that we can NEVER lose our balance. This ideology is simply wrong.
You can test this out right now, stand up on one leg and hold your balance. Are you as still as a statue, or do you go in and out of gaining your balance? So, is TRUE balance something that is stable and still, or is it something that is everchanging and chaotic?
Life isn’t about living a stable, stationary and still existence, that kind of life is boring. Life is about living an authentic and genuine life, despite the chaos, and pursuing balance through it all. Therefore, I encourage you to cast away your belief of balance as a constant state. Instead, replace it with the belief that it’s supposed to be challenging, it’s supposed to be changing, it’s supposed to be hard.
Fighting Through Life 
Leave a comment